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Understanding the Cremation Process in Shawnee, KS

Fri, 08 May 2026 12:00:24 GMT

Summary

• Cremation is a respectful process guided by CANA, NFDA, and FTC standards.

• Each step ensures proper authorization, identification, and care.

• Families receive their loved one’s remains with dignity and compassion.

• Shawnee families have meaningful memorial options after cremation.

What Is the Cremation Process?

Families in Shawnee, Kansas, often wonder what happens during the cremation process. According to the Cremation Association of North America (CANA) and the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), cremation follows a series of careful steps designed to honor each individual with dignity, respect, and professionalism. Understanding the process can help bring families peace of mind.

The process begins with authorization and documentation. The next of kin provides written consent for cremation, and all identification and permits are verified before proceeding. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) regulates funeral providers under the Funeral Rule, which ensures that families receive transparent information and compassionate guidance.

Before cremation, the individual is placed in an approved cremation container, often made of wood or fiberboard. An identification tag stays with them throughout every stage to ensure accuracy. These safeguards, required by CANA and NFDA standards, protect families and ensure trust in the process.

Cremation takes place in a secure, high-temperature chamber designed specifically for this purpose. The process typically lasts several hours and is carried out by trained professionals who follow strict operational and ethical standards. Every step focuses on maintaining dignity and respect.

Afterward, the cremated remains are carefully processed into a fine consistency and placed in an urn or temporary container. Many families in Shawnee choose to hold a memorial service , bury the urn, or scatter ashes in a special location. Each decision reflects the family’s love and remembrance.

Frequently Asked Questions

How long does the cremation process take?

The cremation itself typically takes two to three hours, though preparation and final processing may take an additional day or two.

Can families be present during the cremation?

Some crematories allow family members to witness the beginning of the cremation. Families should ask their funeral director if this option is available.

What happens after cremation?

After the process, the remains are placed in the selected urn or container and returned to the family with full documentation and care.

Written for Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory, proudly serving families in Shawnee with compassion and care.

About Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory

Located at 10901 Johnson Dr, Shawnee, KS 66203 , Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory has proudly served the community for generations. Offering comprehensive funeral, cremation, and memorial services, the funeral home provides professional support to help families honor their loved ones with dignity and respect. For more information, call (913) 631-5566.

www.amosfamily.com

What Is Needed from Next of Kin for Burial and Cremation in Shawnee, Kansas?

Fri, 10 Apr 2026 13:00:08 GMT

Summary

• The next of kin typically provides authorization for burial or cremation.

• Funeral homes often need identification, vital information, and signed authorization forms.

• Documentation requirements vary by state but generally include permit and death certificate details.

• Funeral directors guide families with compassion and clarity throughout the process.

What Is Needed from Next of Kin for Burial and Cremation

Families in Shawnee, Kansas often ask what is required from the next of kin when making burial or cremation arrangements. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), written authorization from the legal next of kin is generally required before any final arrangements can move forward.

The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) explains that this authorization supports transparency under the Funeral Rule and ensures families receive clear and accurate information. The next of kin—often a spouse, adult child, parent, or legal representative—usually holds the authority to approve funeral , burial, or cremation decisions.

Identification and Documentation Requirements

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) highlights the importance of accurate documentation when preparing an official death certificate. Funeral homes often request the following information from the next of kin:

- A government‑issued photo ID for the next of kin.

- Vital information about the deceased, including legal name, date of birth, parents’ names, and Social Security number.

- A signed authorization form for burial or cremation.

- Information needed to complete the official death certificate.

These documents help ensure arrangements meet legal requirements and reflect a family’s wishes.

Why Authorization Matters

Authorization helps confirm that all final arrangements follow legal guidelines and honor a family’s preferences. For burial, the next of kin may need to complete a burial permit and confirm cemetery or vault choices. For cremation , a Cremation Authorization Form is typically required, and depending on the region, there may be a waiting period or medical examiner approval.

Funeral directors at Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory offer compassionate guidance throughout this process, supporting families in Shawnee, Kansas with clarity and care.

FAQs

Who is considered the next of kin?

The next of kin is typically a spouse, adult child, parent, or legal representative with the authority to make funeral, burial, or cremation decisions.

What documents are needed before burial or cremation?

Most funeral homes request a government‑issued ID, essential information for the death certificate, and a signed authorization form.

Do requirements vary by state?

Yes. Documentation requirements often differ depending on the state or region, so families should consult their funeral home for guidance specific to their area.

Written for Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory, proudly serving families in Shawnee, Kansas with compassion and care.

About Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory

Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory is honored to support families throughout Shawnee, Kansas. Their dedicated staff provides steady guidance through each step of funeral and cremation planning. Located at 10901 Johnson Dr, Shawnee, KS 66203, families may reach them at (913) 631-5566 for compassionate assistance.

www.amosfamily.com

Why Do Funeral & Cremation Costs Vary in Shawnee, Kansas?

Fri, 06 Mar 2026 14:00:39 GMT

Summary

Funeral and cremation costs can differ greatly between providers due to regional, facility, and service factors.
According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), costs vary based on location, staff, and available service options.
The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) ensures transparency by requiring itemized price lists through the Funeral Rule.
Families can request General Price Lists (GPLs) and preplan to better understand and manage funeral costs.

Why Do Funeral and Cremation Costs Vary?

Families in Shawnee, Kansas often notice that funeral and cremation costs differ from one provider to another. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), these variations are common and typically reflect differences in regional costs, facilities, and service offerings. All data and averages are accurate as of 2025.

Funeral homes in urban areas often face higher operating expenses, such as property costs and staffing, compared to those in smaller communities. Additionally, funeral homes that provide on-site crematories or more extensive facilities may have higher costs due to equipment and maintenance.

The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) requires all funeral providers to make prices transparent through its Funeral Rule. This means that every family has the right to receive a General Price List (GPL) before making any arrangements. This ensures that families can clearly understand what services and merchandise are included.

The Cremation Association of North America (CANA) also notes that cremation prices vary depending on the type of service chosen. Some families prefer a full-service cremation with a memorial ceremony, while others may select a simpler direct cremation. Each option provides meaningful ways to honor a loved one, and prices will reflect those differences.

Families are encouraged to review available options, request price lists, and consider preplanning . By making decisions ahead of time, families can protect loved ones from financial stress and ensure that arrangements reflect their values and preferences.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do funeral costs vary so much between providers? Funeral costs vary due to factors like regional expenses, facility offerings, staffing, and the range of available services. Each funeral home sets prices based on its own resources and community needs.

Does the FTC regulate funeral home pricing? Yes. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) enforces the Funeral Rule, which requires funeral homes to provide clear, itemized price lists so families can make informed choices.

Can families compare prices before choosing a funeral home? Absolutely. Families have the right to request a General Price List (GPL) from any licensed funeral provider to compare options and plan within their budget.

Written for Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory, proudly serving families in Shawnee with compassion and care.

About Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory

Families in Shawnee, Kansas can turn to Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory for caring and professional guidance when planning ahead. Located at 10901 Johnson Dr, Shawnee, KS 66203 , their dedicated staff can be reached at (913) 631-5566 to answer questions about funeral preplanning and options.

www.amosfamily.com

How Much Does Cremation Cost in Shawnee, Kansas?

Fri, 06 Feb 2026 14:00:04 GMT

Summary

According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the national median cost of a funeral with cremation is about $6,280 as of 2025.
Direct cremation, which does not include a ceremony, typically ranges from $2,800 to $3,000 based on NFDA data.
Cremation costs vary depending on service type, location, and merchandise selections.
Planning ahead can help families make informed choices and manage costs effectively.

How Much Does Cremation Cost?

Families in Shawnee, Kansas often ask how much cremation costs and what affects the total price. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the national median cost of a funeral with cremation is around $6,280. For families who choose direct cremation, where no formal service is held, the average cost ranges from $2,800 to $3,000. These national figures, accurate as of 2025, provide a helpful baseline for understanding cremation expenses.

The total cost of cremation can vary widely. Factors such as the type of service, use of facilities, and merchandise selections often influence pricing. Some families choose a full-service cremation with a memorial or celebration of life, while others prefer a simpler approach. Neither option is better—each provides meaningful ways to honor a loved one’s memory.

Typical cremation services may include professional services of the funeral director and staff, care and preparation of the deceased, use of facilities for a ceremony, and required documentation. Families may also choose an urn or keepsake that reflects their loved one’s wishes. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) ensures transparency through its Funeral Rule, which requires providers to give itemized price lists so families can make informed decisions.

Preplanning a cremation can help reduce stress and financial uncertainty for loved ones. By recording preferences in advance, families ensure their wishes are respected and costs are clearly understood before they are needed.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is included in a cremation service? Cremation services often include the professional service of the funeral director and staff, preparation, use of facilities, and completion of necessary documentation.

Why do cremation prices vary? Cremation costs vary depending on the type of service, the chosen merchandise, and the location of the provider.

Can families still have a ceremony with cremation? Yes. Many families choose to hold a memorial or celebration of life before or after cremation to honor their loved one in a meaningful way.

Written for Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory, proudly serving families in Shawnee with compassion and care.

About Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory

www.amosfamily.com

How Much Does a Funeral Cost in Shawnee, Kansas?

Fri, 09 Jan 2026 14:00:40 GMT

Summary

According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the national median cost of a funeral with viewing and burial is about $8,300 as of 2025.
A funeral with cremation has a national median cost of around $6,280, based on NFDA’s 2024 General Price List Study.
Funeral costs vary based on service choices, merchandise, and regional differences.
Preplanning can help families make informed decisions and manage costs in advance.

How Much Does a Funeral Cost?

Families in Shawnee, Kansas often wonder what to expect when planning a funeral and how much it may cost. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the median cost of a funeral with viewing and burial in the United States is approximately $8,300. For a funeral with cremation, the national median cost is about $6,280. These figures, accurate as of 2025, provide a general understanding of expenses but do not include cemetery costs or additional merchandise.

Funeral costs can vary for many reasons. Location, facility amenities, and the types of services selected all influence the total cost. A full-service funeral typically includes professional services from the funeral director and staff, care of the deceased, use of facilities for a visitation or ceremony, and necessary transportation. Families may also select a casket or urn that reflects their loved one’s preferences.

Each family’s choices and traditions play an important role in determining the final cost. Some may prefer a traditional burial , while others choose cremation followed by a memorial service. Neither option is better—each allows families to create a meaningful way to honor their loved one.

Funeral homes follow federal guidelines set by the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), which require clear, itemized price lists for transparency. This ensures that families have all the information they need to make thoughtful and informed decisions.

Planning ahead can also be an important step toward easing emotional and financial stress. By preplanning, individuals can record their wishes, explore available options, and make arrangements that reflect their values while protecting loved ones from difficult decisions later.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is included in the average funeral cost? Funeral costs often include professional services, use of facilities, care of the deceased, and transportation. Cemetery fees and merchandise are usually additional.

Why do funeral prices vary? Prices vary based on location, the type of service, and personal selections such as caskets, urns, or ceremony details.

How can families manage funeral expenses? Preplanning and open discussion with a trusted funeral professional can help families understand costs and make informed decisions that fit their preferences and budget.

Written for Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory, proudly serving families in Shawnee with compassion and care.

About Amos Family Funeral Home & Crematory

www.amosfamily.com

Memorial Service – Does My Casket or Urn Need to Be Present?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Tue, 11 Feb 2025 18:31:25 GMT

A memorial service differs from a traditional funeral service in that it takes place after final disposition. Final disposition is either the cremation or burial of the deceased. So, the answer is no—neither the urn nor the casket need to be present at a memorial service. That said, in the case of a memorial service following cremation the urn may be present if that is the family’s desire.

Because a memorial service takes place after either burial or cremation have occurred, the urgency to put together a speedy service is removed. A memorial may take place days, weeks, or ever years after a death. This allows a family that is spread over a great distance with time to arrange for travel, time off work, return from overseas postings, or whatever would likely make it impossible for all to gather on short notice.

A memorial service also works well when a family prefers to be more creative in their farewell. The additional time supports the family’s efforts to arrange for music or food. It provides more time to gather photos, find appropriate readings, and find the perfect venue for the service.

A memorial service may be held just about anywhere. Many funeral homes have space designated for these services that includes audio visual equipment and, in some cases, catering and food service capabilities. Be sure to ask your funeral director for guidance and advice.

A memorial service may be faith based if the individual’s religion permits. Some religions require that disposition take place immediately after death, making memorial service the standard. Other denominations require the body be present for the religious part of the service, making a traditional funeral service a better fit. Again, your funeral director is well-versed in the religious traditions in your community and is an invaluable resource for putting together a service that supports your family’s faith base.

There are a few considerations that are best not overlooked when planning a memorial service. The amount of time between death and the memorial service can become protracted and that can create a burden for some family members. Be aware that many people have an acute need to gather with friends and family, talk about the person who died with others who loved them, cry in a safe place, and receive a much-needed hug. The memorial provides that opportunity and until it takes place, their pain is fresh; most people find a service helps put them on firm footing as they begin their grief journey. It is a good idea to check in with close family members and establish a timeline for the memorial service that takes everyone’s needs into consideration.

The second consideration is the “creativity” piece. When we have a traditional funeral service or a religious based funeral service there is a fairly clear roadmap. When that doesn’t fit for you, or your family, and you are not a creative group you need to speak up and ask your funeral director for help. Not every family has people who are comfortable with public speaking to deliver a eulogy or put together music or a photo slide show. Your funeral director is a resource, so feel free to ask for his or her help.

www.amosfamily.com

Five Tips to Help with the Year of Firsts

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Thu, 09 Jan 2025 20:08:16 GMT

The first year following the death of someone dear—a parent, a child, a sibling, a spouse, or a good friend—is frequently referred to as “the year of firsts.” It will be the first time the holidays, birthdays, and the occasions both sad and happy that were shared and witnessed with the person who has passed will come and go alone, without the loved one. For most people it is a tough year. Still there are things that can be done to make experiencing these milestones easier.

1. Avoid being blindsided

Keep an eye on your calendar. Know what is coming. Be aware of the approaching anniversary, birthday, holiday or time of year when you always took a vacation with the person who has died is approaching. Do not let the day sneak up on you and catch you off guard.

2. Know that ignoring the occasion won’t help

When a sensitive occasion is noted on the horizon it may be tempting to think about just ignoring it and letting the day pass. That seldom works out well. Most find the loss of sharing the day with one’s special person cannot be ignored. Trying to do so may mean spending the day alone with a great big elephant in the room.

These are things everyone who has experienced a loss must go through. There is no going around. Grief is often likened to a journey. The first year is full of milestones encountered along the path to living life without the person who was loved. The end of the journey is not forgetting that person, it is finding a way to live life without the loved one in it.

3. Make a plan

Decide how you will mark the occasion. For some a trip to the cemetery will feel right. It might be a good idea to ask a friend or someone who shares your loss to come along. For others it may mean coming up with an alternative plan for spending a holiday. If the day was always celebrated with family at mom’s house and it is mom who has died, the family may all need to be included in how the day will be best celebrated.

4. Acknowledge your loss

Just as ignoring the day is not a good strategy, neither is ignoring the fact someone is missing from the celebration. Perhaps it will be appropriate to acknowledge your loss privately by making a visit to the cemetery or church to say a prayer or have a “chat” with your loved one. In some instances, you may find yourself spending the day with others who share your loss. In that case it may be lovely to include a mention, toast, or other remembrance of the one who died.

5. Include others

If you can, avoid spending the day alone. Do something with someone you love. It doesn’t have to be the same thing you always did with the person who is gone. While it may be enjoyable to carry on a tradition for some, for others the tradition may feel hallow when done with a “replacement person.” What you do should be something you enjoy. The idea is to own your loss, making an effort to celebrate the occasion in a way that is pleasant.

www.amosfamily.com

Holiday Conversations

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 20:05:59 GMT

Lots of folks will have the opportunity to sit down and talk with their parents, siblings or children over the next few weeks. For some, the holidays may be the only time during the year has at least one hot topic it’s best to avoid. But there is one subject that should be tackled, even if it seems hard, while everyone is together.

It’s not the birds and bees talk. It’s the final wishes talk. Has the burial or cremation question been answered? Does everyone know about funeral preferences? Open casket or closed casket, religious or not, what do your parents want their closing ceremony to look, sound, and feel like?

How in the world does one approach this subject? Probably not at the dinner table or while opening the gifts or after too many egg nogs. Find a quiet time. Maybe over a cup of coffee in the morning or on a walk after dinner. Consider putting a frame around the questions that establishes why it’s important to you, to know.

Something like this, “I love this family. It’s always so great when we get together. You know I think about all of you even when I am not here. Sometimes I worry about how we will all handle the tough times when they come. What happens if one of us is sick or dies. It would help me if I knew what you would want us to do if you were sick or if we needed to put together a funeral. Can you help me?”

It’s a tough conversation to have. But it was also hard for your parents to talk to you about birth control and drugs. Still, those were important conversations and they helped. This one will help as well. Getting started is the hardest part. The reward might be holding your family together through what is always one of the toughest times for any family. When a parent dies.

www.amosfamily.com

Saying Thank - You to a Veteran

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 20:04:13 GMT

There are a million ways to say thank you. Great or small they all have value.

Decide to always just say thank you whenever you see a person in uniform.
When you see a person in uniform at the coffee shop or fast food restaurant pick up their tab if you can.
At the airport trade your first class or comfort seat for their standard seat
If you have a neighbor who is deployed offer to play catch with the kids or mow the lawn. Ask how you can help
Send a care package by contacting Operation Gratitude
Donate your old cell phone
Drive a Veteran to their doctor appointments (contact the hospital services coordinator at the local VA hospital)
Write a letter
Volunteer at a VA hospital
If you run a business hire a veteran - Hire Heroes USA
Donate dollars or time to train service dogs for veterans - Patriot Paws or Puppy Jake Foundation
Build a house for a veteran - Building Homes for Heroes

Big dollars or only a few dollars, lots of time or only a little time, where there is a will there is a way to say thank you to those who serve in our military.

www.amosfamily.com

Funeral Service and Veterans Benefits

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 20:00:00 GMT

The Funeral Home is the best resource for understanding veterans death benefits.

The Federal Government provides a death benefit for honorable discharged veterans. The dollar amount varies based on where the death occurs (VA hospital) and if the death was service-related. In most cases the benefit is modest and will not cover the entire cost of a funeral, burial, or cremation. Your local funeral home is an excellent resource to help veterans and their families understand the benefit that is available.

www.va.gov

VA will pay up to $796 toward burial and funeral expenses for deaths on or after October 1, 2019 (if hospitalized by VA at time of death), or $300 toward burial and funeral expenses (if not hospitalized by VA at time of death), and a $796 plot-interment allowance (if not buried in a national cemetery).

Most funeral homes will provide a consultation and planning session at no charge upon request. It is never too soon to schedule a meeting with a funeral planner. Understanding exactly the benefit that will be available upon death is the best way for veterans to assure their family is not misinformed and thereby disappointed in the benefit they receive when death does occur.

The funeral planner will review the current benefits available from the U.S. Government. These benefits have been subject to change over the years, making obtaining current up-to-date information important. The planner will discuss your funeral service desires and your family’s funeral expectations and needs. The planner will also discuss the military graveside service and US flag that can be provided, if you desire, upon death. During your planning session you will also review final disposition options. Final disposition is a term referring to a person’s personal preference to be buried or cremated and the location of your final resting place.

During a meeting with a funeral planner the veteran will have the opportunity to ask questions about burial availability in a local Veteran’s cemetery, funeral service and memorial service options as well as review funeral products such as caskets and vaults that honor the different branches of military service.

It is a good idea bring a copy of discharge papers (DD214) to the meeting. Making a list of your questions and bringing it to the meeting as well will help to assure your questions are answered and nothing is overlooked.

It is also a good idea to ask the planner about any programs the funeral home has to help fill in the cost difference between the US Government Benefit amount and the estimated cost of the funeral service. Many funeral homes provide the opportunity to set up manageable payment plans to cover the gap. Some funeral homes even offer plans that provide coverage for the entire cost should death occur before all payments are complete.

Once a funeral plan is completed it should be kept on file at the funeral home along with a copy of the DD214.

www.amosfamily.com

How to Get the Funeral You Want

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:57:39 GMT

Don’t be afraid to ask the funeral director your question or to speak up and say what you want.

Some events only happen once in a lifetime. Graduations, weddings, and funerals are a few of these one-time occasions. That means the way the event is marked makes a lasting impression. If the cake at the wedding was supposed to be chocolate and it was not it does not ruin the marriage or even the day, but it can mar the occasion and it is usually the thing that is remembered. It was not right and it is never forgotten.

When a funeral is not “right”, when a minister mispronounces the deceased’s name, or the dress mom always told you she wanted to wear is not the one your brother chose, the hurt can go deep and last a long time. Getting the funeral right for your family is very important.

When you meet with the funeral director do not be afraid to speak up. Funeral directors are kind, caring people, but they are not mind readers. Tell your director what you want. Tell her what you do not want. Ask questions. Tell him about your mother, father, or spouse. Ask how to bring out what you loved about the person you lost. Treat the funeral director like you would a wedding planner. Share where family members are having a problem agreeing and ask for guidance.

Rules are made to be broken. If the number of pictures, songs, or readings recommended by the director doesn’t seem to match what you had in mind, speak up. No one at the funeral home wants your family to struggle to get the number of photos for the video down to twenty when what you really want is forty. If what you really want is for your deceased daughter to wear her cheerleading outfit for her visitation and something else for the church service speak up. Just because the body is usually dressed only once doesn’t mean it must be that way. Funeral directors know how important every detail is to the families they serve. They just don’t know what is important to you if you don’t tell them.

www.amosfamily.com

What is a Green Funeral?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:55:32 GMT

The term “green funeral” refers to ceremony, service, and body disposition that focuses on preservation of the earth. Many of those who live “green” also wish to end “green”. Just as living green is carried out in different ways and with many choices, there are also many different methods of having a green funeral. Your funeral director is your best guide to the green funeral options available in your geographic area.

For one person living green may mean passing on the offer of a plastic straw. For others, green may mean living off the grid and bicycling to work. One can be all in, or just a little green. Funerals can also be greenish or very green.

Sometimes a green living choice comes with a cost savings and sometimes going green costs more. For example, you’ll use less fuel with a hybrid automobile. Using less gas will generate a cost savings. However, you will usually pay more for a hybrid car than for the same make and model that is not hybrid. Green is not about saving dollars—it is a lifestyle. A belief system motivated by a sense of responsibility for our home, the planet earth. It is a choice.

If you are motivated to pursue a green goodbye, you will be pleased to know that your choice will not require that you give up any of the healing aspects of a funeral service. Service, gathering, and viewing the body can all be included in a green funeral.

Funeral directors have access to environmentally friendly embalming chemicals. If your family prefers to have the body present for the funeral service that can be accomplished. Should a private family viewing be more in line with your green funeral plans, the body can be simply prepared without embalming to make that experience possible for family members.

Green cemeteries or green areas in traditional cemeteries usually do not require a burial vault or grave liner. The body is shrouded and placed directly in the earth or placed in a biodegradable container which is buried. Those who opt for a green burial do so because disruption to the earth is minimized. No harsh chemicals from embalming, no treated wood or metal casket and no metals or concrete from a grave liner are introduced in the grave space. If you remember our hybrid car example something similar occurs with green burials. In most cemeteries a green burial space will cost more than a traditional burial space, but you will not incur the cost of the vault.

For those who prefer cremation you will need to know that all cremators (the device where cremation takes place) are not created equal. Newer models tend to have a smaller carbon footprint. Ask your funeral director which providers in your area are the most environmentally friendly.

There are also many different green options when it comes to the final resting place for cremated remains. Cremated remains can be incorporated into objects that become family heirlooms, or, they can become part of an underwater reef. There is a nearly unlimited number of earth-friendly alternatives of what to do with cremated remains. When making funeral arrangements tell your funeral director that green is important to you and ask for help in finding service providers that support your values.

www.amosfamily.com

What Helps When a Person Is Sad?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:53:37 GMT

Some things are so simple that it’s easy to doubt their ability to help. In times of trouble, it is often the little things that make all the difference. Chicken soup when you feel a cold coming on, a hug, and a warm chocolate chip cookie all make a person feel better. Even though they don’t really fix the problem, they help.

Writing in a journal on a daily basis may seem like it’s too much trouble to undertake. Especially when a person is in the midst of major life changes like dealing with chronic illness, moving, divorce, or grieving. But journaling has been proven to elevate mood and really help people deal with crisis and loss.

A journal does not judge, a journal will not be uncomfortable with your sorrow, a journal will not try to “fix” you. A journal is a silent listener. You set the pace. It lets you have good days and bad days. A journal absorbs anger and celebrates joy. It helps a person move through the hard work of grieving.

If you know someone who has experienced a loss or is going through a difficult life change, give them a journal. If you receive a journal use it. It may take a while to become comfortable with writing on a daily basis. Stick with it. It takes a while to ingrain a habit.

Pick a time of day that works for you and set aside fifteen minutes to write. Some like to start their day with a journal entry. Others prefer to end their day with a few quiet minutes with the pen and a blank page. Write whatever comes to your mind. It’s not a novel. Spelling and grammar don’t matter. What you write doesn’t need to make sense or be eloquent.

What does matter is that you actually write, not type. Laying down words with a pen or pencil on paper is processed by the brain differently than typing. It just is. It also matters that you journal every day.

Writing in a journal won’t fix your problems, but it will help you grapple with and succeed at working through what ails you.

www.amosfamily.com

Celebrity Funerals and Ceremonies

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:50:30 GMT

On February 24th, 2020, twenty thousand mourners filled downtown Los Angeles' Staples Center — “the house that Kobe built” — to celebrate the lives of the 41-year-old Lakers star and his 13-year-old daughter, who were killed alongside seven others in the crash in Calabasas. With tears streaming down his face, Michael Jorden spoke about his “big brother” mentoring relationship with Kobe. Beyoncè sang KO, one of Kobe’s favorites, and his wife Vanessa bravely spoke about her daughter, her husband, and her loss.

Kobe’s life is not the first to be celebrated in a large public way. Princess Diana, Michael Jackson, and John McCain all had funeral services that were shared with large groups of their fans or followers. These very large and very public funerals acknowledge the family’s loss is our loss too. They help the community heal.

We may not have ever had a face to face conversation or sat down to break bread with any of these people, but we loved them. Kobe was a master of his game and it was pure joy to watch him play. He went well beyond just playing basketball and shared his love of the game and impact it had on his life with a whole new generation in his books and his movie. He was larger than life.

His wife and family’s kindness in sharing their celebration of his life, and that of his daughter, with his fans is beautiful. It will help all of us heal. We can only hope knowing this, we were there witnessing tributes to a man who was admired, respected, and loved by so many. Hopefully the healing began then.

www.amosfamily.com

Moving on With Life After the Death of a Loved One

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:42:09 GMT

Moving on is not the same as forgetting. Moving on after the death of a loved one, especially a spouse, just means actively engaging in life. It means reaching a point where the mourner has things to look forward to again. J. William Worden, PhD tells us the fourth task mourners must accomplish as they move through grief is to “find an enduring connection with the deceased while moving on with life.”

In Worden’s model, moving on is described as a task rather than a stage. That’s an important distinction and implies active engagement on the part of the mourner. It gives the survivor some control and responsibility for the direction of their life moving forward.

The more closely entwined the mourner’s life was to the life of the deceased the harder it will be to “move on with life.” When a person’s life has been moving along in lock step with a spouse or partner for the better part of his or her adult life, the adjustment can be very difficult.

Some mourners will decide to move on with life as a single. That will mean changing plans. The trips or activities a couple planned to do together will now need to be undertaken alone, with a friend, or abandoned and changed entirely. An open mind and willingness to stretch one’s comfort zone can bring new opportunities.

When one door closes another door opens. Painful as it is to lose a spouse, it is possible to find yourself with time to engage in hobbies or interests that had be put on the shelf because they were not enjoyed by a partner.

Some mourners will partner up again with someone new. With that method of moving on comes the task of overcoming fear and putting oneself out there … dating. It may mean working with other family members to gain acceptance of the new person in one’s life. It will most certainly mean adjusting to new expectations, personalities, and habits. A new spouse will never be just like the one who died.

Whatever the path a widow or widower takes new skills will need to be learned, new things will need to be tried, and adjustments made. It takes work. But then isn’t that just a part of life?

www.amosfamily.com

Cremation Society or Funeral Home

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:35:53 GMT

Cremation, like electric cars and cell phones is here to stay. For some people cremation is part of their religious practice. For other people, cremation just feels right for them. The big question is who should help you with your cremation, a society or a funeral director?

Cremation Societies specialize in what is called a direct cremation. Direct cremation means the society will remove the deceased from the place of death and take the body directly to their crematory where the cremation process will take place. Following cremation, the ashes are returned to the family in a bag or box. It’s all pretty quick. The cost is quite low for direct cremation.

But something is missing.

How do we feel when a family member dies? What helps? Death is a loss. It is hard to describe how loss feels, but it is something like a void, a vacuum, or an energy shift. You see something close when you watch victims of the California wild fires or a tornado on television. You see that dazed and stunned look on their faces. That is loss. There they stand looking at a pile of rubble that was their home … and now it is gone. That look is about loss of a building. Loss of a person, someone you love, is so much more. It hurts your heart.

Funeral directors are trained and specialize in taking care of the deceased AND in taking care of the family of the deceased. They know people need more. They are going to encourage you to slow down a little and give the family a little time for the reality of the loss to sink in. Give a little time for the family to consider what they need to do to begin to heal.

Funeral directors specialize in helping families put together a gathering to honor the one who died. They know that being with those you love and who love you helps. They know words, as a part of a religious, spiritual, or life celebration ceremony help. Funerals are the funeral director’s specialty. They have done this many times with many families. Funeral directors are the experts.

Of course, the funeral home will help you with a direct cremation if that is what your family prefers. To be fair, cremation societies will also add on some service options at the family’s request. As you add services the cost increases. It is important to look for value.

The funeral home is staffed by licensed trained funeral directors and serves families from a clean, company ready facility with plenty of parking and is a good value. Do your homework. Where will cremation take place? If your family wants service where will the service take place? If you add service and products what is the difference in price? How important is cost over expertise? Share your budget with the funeral director at your funeral home. Don’t assume you need to sacrifice ceremony for savings.

www.amosfamily.com

Normandy’s Hallowed Ground

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:31:32 GMT

Every year on June 6, we recognize the anniversary of the Normandy Invasion during World War II. The invasion by the Allied Forces established a foothold on the shores of France; and was the start of the Allied advance into the interior which eventually lead to victory in Europe and liberty for the millions of people living under the tyranny of Adolf Hitler. The costly battle was the most important allied victory in the second world war.

The campaign began on June 6 and ended on June 30. During that period 425,000 Allied and German troops were killed, wounded, or went missing. Many are buried in the 27 war cemeteries, ranging in size from 30 graves to 20,000, in Normandy.

The Normandy American Cemetery is the resting place for 9,387 Americans, most of whom gave their lives during the landing operations and in the establishment of the beachhead. The headstones are of white Italian marble adorned with a Star of David for those of Jewish faith and a Latin Cross for all others. The permanent cemetery is located on land France granted to the United States in perpetuity.

For those fortunate enough to visit the burial grounds, the experience is singular. Approaching alone or with a group the mood changes. Breathing slows, the chatter quiets, tones are hushed. The feeling is somber. It draws you in.

And then, there it is, pristine lush green lawn dotted by thousands of white markers in perfect formation overlooking the very beaches where those buried here fought and died.

Visitors are, at first, overwhelmed by the sheer number of markers. But as you get closer and begin to read the engravings, the reality of the cost of war begins to sink in. So many died, they were so very young, and all lost in such a short span of time.

All those lives ended before they ever really began. So many who would never find their true love, hold a new born child of their own, or buy a home. So many who never got to experience all the post war changes the rest of us take for granted. Those buried here did not live to see air travel become commonplace, a man land on the moon or watch a color television.

They were heroic and their sacrifice was great. We must never forget.

The anniversary is an opportunity to honor those lost. It is also an opportunity celebrate peace and reconciliation. In our mindfulness we become aware of the fragility of peace and the pain of war. It is that mindfulness that makes us better people.

In the words of the late John Lennon…

Imagine all the people
Living life in peace 

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

www.amosfamily.com

Flowers and Funerals

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:28:42 GMT

What’s the story behind flowers at a funeral? Well, back in the day before funeral directors perfected the art and science of embalming, flowers were used to mask the odor of the body.

In modern times flowers are no longer needed to mask unpleasant odors but they have come to be a part of the funeral for other reasons. When we struggle to find words to comfort a friend, flowers speak eloquently for us. They express that we care. Flowers can be sent from any place in the world to any place in the world. When we are not able to go to the service, flowers stand in our stead. Flowers are always in good taste and they are appreciated for the beauty and serenity they bring to the occasion.

Did you know different flower colors have different meanings? White flowers symbolize honor and innocence. In many religions, death means going to heaven and a return to innocence. White lilies, carnations, roses, and cushion poms are often used in funeral arrangements.

Red flowers are frequently given by a spouse or close family member. Red blooms symbolize courage, strength, and love. The red tulip is a symbol of perfect love. Blue flowers such as hydrangea and cornflowers represent peace and serenity. Yellow flowers symbolize friendship and new beginnings.

Flowers for the casket are usually provided by close family members. Funeral flowers are sent directly to the funeral home and are not usually addressed to a particular family member, but rather are sent in honor of the deceased. It is appropriate to send smaller cut flowers or plants of remembrance to individual family members at their home.

Flowers help us communicate feelings of the heart. Flowers speak for us and say we love you, we support you, we are proud of you, and we are with you on your grief journey.

In recorded time, and probably before, communities have understood the importance of gathering following a death. Paying respects to the deceased and comforting the survivors has been a part of life. Coming together when an important life event occurs is just natural. We come to see the new baby and we gather when a loved one’s life on this earth ends. We celebrate and remember with flowers.

www.amosfamily.com

Celebrating Grads and Grands

Wed, 04 Dec 2024 19:25:46 GMT

Millions of high school students across the nation will graduate this year. There will be parties, balloons, cakes and speeches. Many of these young people will receive the gift of a wonderful little book written at 87 years of age by Dr. Seuss.

Oh, the Places You’ll Go! was the last book to be published during Seuss’s lifetime. It’s about the journey of life and its challenges. It’s inspiring and makes a terrific graduation gift and is sure to be appreciated by any graduating senior…especially when a check, gift card, or tickets to Europe are stuck inside.

But what about the other end of life. Shouldn’t there be another book… Oh, the Places You Have Been? Why, do people feel diminished as they age? Why are we taking less and less time to wrap up a life and tie it with a pretty ribbon? Why do we say, “No fuss needed for me, no funeral needed.”? Surely six, seven, or even nine decades of life are worth celebrating.

At the end of every life shouldn’t there be a look back? What about the choices that were made, the work that was done, the people encountered, the things that were learned? What about all that? Shouldn’t just sticking with it through all the ups and the downs of life merit a celebration of some kind? As Seuss advises, “With brains in your head and shoes full of feet, you can steer yourself in any direction you choose.”

There have to be stories. This is the generation that began with a party line telephone and is ending up with telephone watches that take pictures and tell you how many steps you’ve taken in a day! There have to be stories. These people served in Vietnam, listened to the Beatles, watched a man land on the moon. They had black and white TV that only sent a signal a few hours a day and they walked to the TV to change channels! There have to be stories.

Now is the time. Capture those stories. Ask your parent(s) about their life before you. Ask the same of grandparents. Ask about their hopes and dreams. What surprised them? What was fun and what was hard? Capture the stories and the life lessons. Prepare to celebrate the grands as well as the grads.

www.amosfamily.com

Should We Have an Open Casket?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:39:02 GMT

“I was very surprised at my reaction. Seeing John in his casket wasn’t something I was looking forward to. His daughter (from his first marriage) really wanted an open casket. So, I agreed. Mostly just to remain on good terms with my stepdaughter. He looked so peaceful. He had a Mona Lisa smile. I am so glad I didn’t stick to what he and I had talked about. The opportunity for that last good good-bye ended up meaning the world to me… and his daughter.”

Many long-standing funeral practices, like viewing the deceased, are undervalued today. Perhaps we should think again? Maybe go slowly? Allow for individual family members to say goodbye in a way that is most meaningful to them.

There is a value to “seeing” the deceased. If you doubt that value think about what happens when there is a sudden, unexpected death. Body recovery is high on everyone’s list. Seeing is believing. Some family members may find an opportunity to see the deceased helpful. Some, like the woman who wrote the opening quote, may be surprised at the comfort the opportunity to see the person they love at peace brings.

The funeral director is there to guide you. Ask questions. How can we give my grandson an opportunity to see his grandfather? What if some family do not wish to see dad? Mom didn’t want an open casket but some of us would like an opportunity to see her one last time. What can we do?

Funeral directors are always willing and able to allow for individual family differences. A daughter who prefers not to view the body and grandson who would very much appreciate an opportunity for a face to face farewell. One need not exclude the other. Funeral directors have solutions. When you meet with yours, be open. Share your family’s needs and ask questions.

www.amosfamily.com

Why Not Call the Funeral Director?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:38:43 GMT

A husband and father of four dies suddenly. He languishes in the morgue at the coroner’s office for weeks because no one knows what to do and no one is empowered to act. The only thing the kids and grandchildren can agree on is that their father did not want to spend a lot of money on a funeral.

It is just downright crazy the things folks will do to work around the funeral home when a family member dies. Let’s get real about the widespread and totally unreasonable fear of working with a funeral director. The origin of the fear is the belief that funerals cost too much. Let’s take a look at the reality.

Funeral directors are educated professionals. Like doctors and lawyers, they meet rigorous state requirements in order to be licensed to practice. Funeral directors do expect to be paid for the work they do. However, unlike doctors and lawyers, funeral directors do not typically charge for a consultation. Which means a family can talk with a director about options and cost before they make a commitment to actually have the funeral home provide services.

A person should not expect this is something one should do on the fly over the phone. That is just unreasonable. You would not expect to call Macy’s and ask how much a pair of shoes will cost. Everyone knows it is not that simple. You are going to need to provide more information about the kind of shoe you need to get an accurate cost. In the same way there are literally hundreds of possible combinations of funeral services and products. The cost depends on what your family wants and needs.

So instead, call the funeral home and ask for an appointment with a funeral director to learn about options for service and cost. When you sit down with the director you will be presented with a general price list. This list will detail all the services and costs. What could be more up front than that? What other professional group will provide you with that kind of information?

Be prepared to share both your budget and what is important to your family. Please, do not let unreasonable fear keep you from getting the professional help your family needs when someone they love has died.

www.amosfamily.com

Expressions of Condolences

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:38:28 GMT

Back in the day, before embalming was wide-spread, flowers surrounded the casket and perfumed the air. Today, it is no longer necessary to have flowers scent the air. And yet, there is something comforting about the presence of flowers at a funeral.

Flowers are beautiful. What an amazing way nature has provided for life to go on. The flower is the promise of the future for a plant. Flowers are cheerful. They are calming. When we are the recipient of a floral bouquet or arrangement, we feel cared about, loved, and comforted. Flowers are visual. They are tangible. Family and friends can see the love that was directed at the person who has died. They can see the love that is directed at them in their time of sorrow. So, why not send flowers? Send them to the funeral home or to the home of family members.

If flowers are not how you would like to show your condolences, florists can also offer non-floral expressions.

Many florists also offer a variety of statuary, memorial pieces such as crosses or even throw blankets. Call your local florists and let them assist you with the perfect item.

Another option is to direct the money people would spend on flowers to a charity or a cause that was important to the deceased. A contribution is a lovely gesture of remembrance. Cures can be found, treatment provided, lives saved or enhanced, through charitable contributions.

If you are the family member deciding what to do - donations or flowers - there is no real right or wrong. Maybe you accept any form of condolences. Allow friends and family to express their feelings in a manner appropriate for them. Instead of using the language “in lieu of flowers” in the announcement just say, “Donations to __________ will be appreciated. Flowers or expressions of sympathy may be sent to .” That way folks can decide on their own how they want to show respect and provide comfort.

If you are going to a funeral and are undecided about sending flowers, a memorial item or a donation, do what feels good to you. If you think the family is likely to be overwhelmed with flowers you might pull together a group of folks, neighbors, co-workers, church friends, the bridge group, and send one floral arrangement or gift from all. If a charity has not been designated but you would prefer to contribute in remembrance of the deceased, contribute to a cause that is dear to you.

There is no right or wrong, sending flowers or a contribution, let the family know they are loved and the person they loved and lost was important.

www.amosfamily.com

The Changing Face of American Veterans

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:38:11 GMT

Veteran’s Day is the day Americans set aside to honor all who have served in the military during times of war and times of peace. We thank them all.

Many books have been written and movies made about World Wars I and II, Korea, and even Vietnam. But, what do we know about our post 9/11 Veterans? Who are they? Who do we thank?

When the draft ended in 1973, all branches of the armed services began the transition to the all-volunteer military force we have today. Since that time, the makeup of the military has been changing. While the total number of troops serving is declining, the force is becoming more diverse racially, ethnically, and by gender.

The majority of new recruits come from families with incomes between $38,345 – $80,912. Eighty percent come from families with a history of service. Their father, uncle, or grandfather also served. The share of the US population with military experience is on the decline. Seven percent of the total US population served in 2016 down from eighteen percent in 1980.

Fifty six percent of active duty personal are married, seven percent are in dual military families and thirty nine percent have children. According to a study conducted by the Rand Corporation since 2001, 2.77 million service members have served on 5.4 million deployments across the world with soldiers from the Army accounting for the bulk of them. Deployed personnel were under 30 years old on average, over half were married and about half had children.

On average military personnel sign on for four years of active duty plus four years in the reserves. Deployment for service personnel is typically for a period of 12 months followed by 12 months stateside. A post 9/11 service person will very likely see a second deployment during their term of enlistment. Career service members typically rotate 12 months deployed, 12 months home, 12 months deployed, 24 months home.

So, who do we thank? We thank all service men and women. We thank the husbands, wives and children of our service men and women. Post 9/11 military service is a family job.

www.amosfamily.com

Five “To Dos” When You Hit 70

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:37:52 GMT

Life from age 70 to 75 is interesting. It might not be a mid-life crisis but nearly everyone finds it is a period of real-life adjustments. In moving from being a 69-year-old to 70-year-old it’s easy to say, so what? Going in, 70 might feel like the new 50. Especially if a person is healthy and active. But by 75 it usually dawns on people that 80 is not going to be the new 60! It’s time to get real and embrace and prepare for life moving forward.

There are both some big questions to ponder and some little things to do to make life going forward easier. In the big category, a couple might consider where they are living. A simple thing like not having a first-floor bedroom or bath can mean a stay in a rehabilitation facility if a hip or knee needs to be replaced. By the time one hits the 75 mark they know more than a few folks who are walking around with replacement parts.

Then there is the question of whether your home is even in the “right” location? Some people choose to leave friends and their current life in favor of moving closer to their children or family. There is no one “right” choice—however, considering the what ifs can help a person be sure they are settled in their own personal happy place.

Much easier, but not less important, is making sure that you have designated someone to make medical decisions on your behalf if you are no longer able to do so yourself. Most folks will choose their spouse. However, it is a good idea to be sure the individual one chooses understands your desires and has the emotional strength to carry out your wishes. In some cases, it may be kinder to designate an adult child to make decisions. Regardless of who you choose, making sure all family members know what you want to have happen and who you have designated to carry out your wishes, can save a lot of family heartache in the future.

Even easier, but still important, is taking a few steps in order to eliminate those little stressors that can ruin an entire day. Making a simple adjustment to your utilities, cable, or telephone can be a real challenge if you are not the person “of record” on the account. If the designated person has died it can get even more complicated.

Check to be sure both spouses have the authority to make changes to the account or service. Be sure the secret passwords and answers to security questions are known to both parties. Watch your “ands” and “ors”. “And” can mean you both have to be involved where “or” means either party can take action. “And” can mean you’ll need a death certificate where “or” can mean full speed ahead.

Finally, it really is time to consider the end. When your children, grandchildren, and friends come together to remember you, what will that gathering look and feel like? Who will be in charge? Who will be responsible for making and paying for the arrangements? This one is the easiest of them all—you simply call your funeral home and ask for a prearrangement appointment. It will take just a few hours to get all your questions answered and have a plan on file at the funeral home. Then you just go right along heading to 80, eating right, exercising, and seeing the world, because maybe 80 is the new 60?

www.amosfamily.com

Planning for Cremation

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:37:34 GMT

1. Choose a cremation provider

2. Decide on a “closing” ceremony

3. Choose a final resting place

Start with the end. Where will your cremated remains “rest”? There are three general choices and a variety of options within each choice. On average, a cremated human body will be reduced to about five pounds of coarse “ash”.

· Ashes can be kept by a family member

· Buried or permanently kept in a columbarium niche

· Scattered

Very few people really “don’t have anybody”. Friends are the family we choose and then there is the family. Most of us are deeply connected to at least one other human being. These are the people who need some time to be with others to begin to process their loss of you.

· A funeral service (with or without a religious service) can be held before the cremation takes place

· A memorial service occurs after the cremation takes place. It may or may not include a religious service.

· Either a funeral or a memorial service can be formal, informal, or very informal. Either can be held pretty much anywhere.

Funeral homes either provide cremation at the funeral home or coordinate transportation from the place of death to the cremation facility. They can also help you choose a final resting option and coordinate the closing ceremony. Most funeral homes have a person on staff who will meet with you, answer all your questions, and help determine which options work best for you and the people who are important to you. Amazingly enough this is a free service. A cremation society or direct cremation provider will take care of the cremation.

You can:

· Take advantage of your local funeral home’s planning service (no charge)

· Sign up for a cremation society and leave everything else to those who love you.

www.amosfamily.com

How Often Do I Need To Change the Furnace Filter?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:36:54 GMT

When there is a breakup, illness, or death and the person in the household who took care of the household necessities is no longer available, it isn’t long before you know you need help. Finding someone to do these little jobs can be difficult. It’s a good idea to be prepared to learn how to do some things yourself.

Most furnace filters will need to be changed every three months / four times a year. If you can see dust and dirt or can’t see the fabric pattern of the filter, it needs to be replaced. Keeping up with filter replacement is good for your furnace. It is also good for your health. Changing a filter is a pretty easy task to complete once you know where it goes and how it is inserted into your air handler. Buy a year’s supply of filters, mark your calendar to remind you when it’s time for a change and get someone to show you how it’s done. You want to be as independent as you can be, so take notes if you need to. Tape them to the furnace so you’ll be all set for the next filter change.

Often the “filter changer” was also in charge of auto maintenance so you may also need to know more about care of the car. For example, how often to you need to change the oil in the car? What about getting the car waxed? Some people like to use the dealership where the car was purchased for maintenance. Others are sure they can get it done at an independent garage for less money. Just be sure you are not being penny wise and pound foolish. You might start with the service provider your previous auto maintenance person used. If you have no idea, ask someone you trust.

Typically, oil changes take place based on miles driven and type of oil used. Some cars use synthetic oil which comes at a higher cost but requires changing far less frequently. Find your car’s owner’s manual (it’s usually in the glove box of the car) and read. In the upper left corner of the windshield you might find a sticker that tells you the date of the last change and the mileage when you will need your next change. If you drive very little and don’t hit your mileage, it is still best to keep the oil in your car fresh. Change the oil at least twice a year.

Now, about keeping up with the appearance of your car. It is also good for resale and the look of your car to keep it clean and waxed. Spend the dollars for a hand wax at least twice a year.

If you are lucky, you’ll have a son or son-in-law or maybe even a helpful neighbor who will offer to help with your “manly” chores, but here’s an important tip: Plan your help and coordinate the chores. Ask for help getting the gutters cleaned, furnace filters changed, and light bulbs in the fan all taken care of during the same visit. You don’t want to be that person who is always calling for help. Also, don’t forget to reward your handy person. A gift card for your handyman and his wife to go out to dinner will keep everyone smiling.

www.amosfamily.com

Routine Is a Life Saver

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:36:34 GMT

In times of stress routine is a life saver.

In times of stress, loss, and change, the most important coping skill is taking control of your time. You must establish a routine. Picture a fish out of water. That’s how a person feels in the midst of grief, loss, or any major life change. Without a plan they flip, flop, and ultimately flounder.

Regular sleep patterns are the foundation of routine. Establishing regular sleep wake cycle is easier said than done since we tend to be more restless sleepers when we are stressed. So, here are a few tips.

1. Turn off electronics one hour before bedtime. Experts tell us the blue light from electronics is a sleep disrupter.

2. Avoid alcohol and caffeine before bedtime.

3. A recommended bedtime snack would be a bowl of oats with milk and banana.

Even if you are waking in the night and having a problem getting back to sleep, still get out of bed at your predetermined time in the morning. If you need a nap during the day make it a 20-minute power nap.

Eat your meals at regular times. Regular sleep and eating times help the body establish its circadian rhythm. Take control. Plan your dinner for the evening in the morning and your breakfast for the next day in the evening before you go to bed.

Plan some physical exercise into your day. Going to the gym may be too daunting but anyone can take a walk, or take the stairs, or park the car in the third row instead of the first row at the supermarket. Just make moving a priority.

Make a list of three things you’ll do tomorrow before you go to bed and then do them. Checking off your list helps provide the feeling of accomplishment. Make your bed first thing when you wake-up. Start the day the way the Marines do with a job well done. Establish a regular day for changing the bed, doing laundry, and performing your cleaning chores.

Connect with people. Start or join a book club. Have lunch once a week or month with the guys or girls. Become active in your church or volunteer to tutor children.

Repetition is what establishes regular habits. You’ll be tempted to abandon your new routine but stick with it. If you fail at first start over and try again.

www.amosfamily.com

What To Expect When Your Catholic Friend Dies.

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:35:49 GMT

Roman Catholic refers to a religious body that acknowledges the pope as its authority and the Vatican as the center of ecclesiastical unity. The Catholic Church’s position on death is as follows … From the General Introduction of the Order of Christian Funerals: “The Church intercedes on behalf of the deceased because of its confident belief that death is not the end… The Church also ministers to the sorrowing and consoles them in the funeral rites with the comforting word of God and sacrament of the eucharist.”

Funeral services for a Catholic, in their entirety, will have three parts. Today it is not uncommon for one or more parts to be omitted or abbreviated. Still, the Church recommends the funeral contain all three parts since each has a special function or purpose. The parts include:

1. The Vigil or Wake: This is an opportunity for family, community, and friends to gather, pray, and offer condolences to the family of the deceased. It is a time to remember the life of the deceased. The vigil…

· Usually takes place at the funeral home the evening before the service or morning before the service at the church.

· The body is usually present. The casket may or may not be open. Mourners will approach the casket and say a silent prayer.

· Eulogies, pictures, secular music, and food may be a part of this service. What is included varies depending on the ethnicity of the family and their traditions. This is a time for focusing on the life of the deceased. Having the Vigil in the funeral

home almost always allows for a greater flexibility when it comes to eulogies,

pictures, secular music and food as many churches do not have the same

capabilities as funeral homes, and many will have policies limiting activities,

especially if the vigil were to take place in their worship space.

· A priest or deacon may lead those gathered in a brief prayer service.

2. The Funeral Liturgy: This is the liturgical celebration of the community for the deceased. A Mass is encouraged. The funeral liturgy is an act of worship.

· The priest, followed by the casket and then the family, will process into the church.

· Attendees who are not Catholic may stand, sit, and kneel along with Catholics during the service/Mass. Guests who are not comfortable with kneeling may sit during the entire service.

· No special head covering is required for women or men.

· Prayers will be read, and communion will be distributed.

· Only Catholic attendees may receive communion. This is out of respect for what

Catholics believe communion is and out of respect for the fact that non-Catholics

do not share the same belief.

· Eulogies and secular music will not be a part of this service.

3. The Interment: Funeral guests are invited to attend the interment.

· Prayers will be led by the priest or deacon.

· Military rites may be included if applicable.

· The grave will be closed after participants leave the cemetery.

· A wake or luncheon may follow the interment and can be held at the funeral home, the church hall, or a restaurant.

When a Catholic dies it is appropriate to:

· Telephone or stop by to offer condolences.

· Send flowers to the funeral home or to the home of close family members.

· To bring food to the family.

· To make a contribution to charities in honor of the deceased.

1. Catholic funeral

2. Funeral traditions

3. Three steps

4. Showing respect

5. To kneel or not to kneel

6. What can you do?

7. Catholic funeral explanations

www.amosfamily.com

After the Funeral…What To Look Forward To

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:35:24 GMT

Sometimes the future feels bleak. For those struggling with a recent death in their family or just beaten down by the news, it can be difficult to look forward, to anticipate, to feel hopeful.

Most of us are removed from the rituals of spring. The tilling of the earth, getting our hands in the compost, planting seeds, all simple pursuits that are, by their nature, full of hope. Even if you are living in a community that takes care of your landscape, or a group living arrangement or even in a big city high rise it is really not that hard to grow something. Something that you can nurture, and watch grow - a little something to look forward to.

Grow Something to Eat!

· A basil plant from the grocery store just needs a sunny window and water. A little bit of your own home-grown basil in your tomato soup, or your scrambled eggs, or a salad will make you smile.

· Have a little more room? Go for a tomato plant. It’ll need a little more attention and space. You’ll need to rotate the pot, water, and support the branches but nothing tastes like a vine ripened home-grown tomato. As you watch it go from bloom to fruit the anticipation will build.

Grow Something to Attract the B’s … Birds, Bees, & Butterflies

· Milk weed, bee balm, cone flowers… The list is long. You are sure to find something that works in your spot be it little or large. Use plants or seeds that are not treated with pest controls and if you have the space go for a little variety that will extend your blooming season. The B’s need you and nothing lifts the spirits like being needed! They are also entertaining/fun to watch and something to look forward to. Try it, you’ll see.

Feed the Hummingbirds

· Hummingbirds are amazing! Once they know you have a feeder, they will show up every morning and evening. You’ll have fun watching them “protect” their feeder. It’s like snoopy and the red baron the way they zoom and dive on each other. Much better than the 24-hour news channel. All you need is a simple feeder. Some feeders attach to the outside of your window with suction cups. The food is simple to make. Just one-part sugar to four parts of water, warm it up in the microwave or stove top just to dissolve the sugar. Then cool and store in the fridge. You’ll be surprised how much they eat! Best part is once they get used to seeing you at the window, they’ll make your day.

www.amosfamily.com

Do I Need a “Final Resting Place”?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:35:01 GMT

Let’s face it everyone will have one, a final resting place that is. The questions you should be asking are where is it? Can it be found in the future should a family member want to do so? Is the final resting place protected? Is it hallowed ground? Will the place endure?

Most of us know exactly where our great grandparents are “resting.” It’s in a cemetery somewhere. Even when the grave is half a continent away and we never get there to put flowers on the grave, we know where they are. Will our grandchildren know where we rest?

For those who would like to be buried in a cemetery

· Fear not. There are spaces available check with your funeral director for advice about where to look.

· Worried about the environment? Again, ask your funeral director about green and greenish burial options.

· Concerned about cost? Consider the resale market. Many family’s plans change. Families resell cemetery plots they will not use at a lower cost.

For those who plan to donate their body to science

· Know that in most cases the cremated remains will be returned to the family at some point and will require a plan for the final resting place.

· Always have a back-up plan just in case the body is not accepted for donation.

· Talk to your funeral director about how to put together a memorial service to take place right after death since it may be months or even years before ashes are returned to the family.

For those who will be cremated

· Consider your many options carefully. You may want to discuss them with your funeral director. There may be final resting options you are not aware of.

· If you plan to scatter ashes, give thought to the location and how family members will be impacted if the golf course is sold and turned into a go-kart track? Keep in mind that if you belong to a faith such as Catholicism, the Church does not permit scattering and would instead advocate for a permanent final resting place.

· Talk to your funeral director about keepsakes such as paperweights that incorporate some of the ashes or jewelry that can hold a small amount of cremated remains. Again, if you belong to the Catholic faith, this is not permitted.

· Be aware that final resting place means it must endure for generations to come. Will your children’s children still want your urn in their home?

· Know having a viable plan for the final resting place is the most often overlooked step for those who cremate. Not addressing this issue creates a burden for someone in the family as time passes. Talk to your funeral director.

www.amosfamily.com

Thinking No Funeral? Think again.

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Fri, 12 Jul 2024 17:34:21 GMT

Maybe you’ve said it, or thought it? “I don’t need a funeral. You can just bury me in the backyard”. That’s the male version of negating the need for a funeral. But the sentiment is not unique to men. Women just say it differently. “I don’t want you to make a fuss. I don’t need a funeral.” These folks are right. The person who died doesn’t need a funeral. They just need a legal, respectful disposal of their body. It’s the people who are left to do the work of grieving that need the support and community from a funeral.

Princess Diana, Michael Jackson, Aretha Franklin, John McCain, and most recently Kobe Bryant, didn’t need the memorials, teddy bears, or flowers. We needed them. We need to be a part of acknowledging the loss. We find comfort in being able to be a part of the service that honors their lives even when our part is just being an observer via television. We are comforted, in some measure, just by being able to observe.

It is human nature to seek community in times of trouble and in times of joy. People are pack animals. We don’t live in isolation. We touch the lives of others. We celebrate birth with family and friends. We celebrate the coming together of two people in marriage as a group. We hold each other’s hand in times of tragedy. When we express our caring feelings, it is not weakness. It’s our strength. We are human beings, we care.

Having the opportunity to express our feelings is not expected to “cure” our grief. Coming together does not provide closure. The door never really closes on the love one human being has for another. Coming together, expressing our feelings in the presence of our community, are steps in the healing process. Being able to express our feelings in a safe, accepting environment provides some measure of healing.

Grief in the early days is raw. As time passes it softens. The hard edges become rounded and we begin to find the joy we had with the one we loved in our memories. Grief is hard work. It’s a journey.

Why should anyone have to begin this journey alone?

www.amosfamily.com

Jewish Funeral Traditions

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Wed, 10 Jul 2024 01:07:16 GMT

As we begin to learn more about religious practices outside of our own, it is sometimes surprising to find how much different faiths have in common. Mourners of all faiths understand the power of grief and the comfort of community. So, what happens when a person of the Jewish faith dies, and how can a person outside that faith support a friend or neighbor who is grieving?

In order to support a person of the Jewish faith when they have experienced a loss, one must learn about the Kaddish and sitting Shiva. According to Jewish Law anyone who has lost a parent, sibling, child, or spouse recites Kaddish every day beginning with the funeral and continuing for thirty days after the death. The Mourners Kaddish is a prayer, a profession of faith. The prayer is a listing of God’s holy attributes. Jewish law requires that sanctification of God’s name and requires ten voices … a minyan. This requirement of a minyan assures that the mourner is not alone. For thirty days the Mourners Kaddish is recited in the presence of at least ten people. According to Anita Diamant in her book Saying Kaddish… “The power of Kaddish comes, in large measure, from the consolations of being in a group that recognizes and embraces the bereaved”.

The Hebrew word for funeral is Levayah, which means “accompanying”. There is no religious requirement for clergy to be present at a Jewish funeral. The responsibility is on the family. The service does not address the ideas of heaven, redemption or reunion, the focus is on the life of the deceased. The service is simple. Here are no flowers or music, the casket is lowered and all in attendance participate in covering the coffin. Once the casket is lowered the business of caring for the dead is ended. The focus now shifts to mourning and supporting the family in their grief.

Shiva or “sitting Shiva” is a time for the bereaved. Traditionally Shiva lasts for seven days, although in modern times that is sometimes abbreviated to three days. It is a time to “sit” with grief. During Shiva the bereaved do not work or play. No calling into the office, no cooking, no dishes, no television or video games. Shiva is a time to do grief work. It is a time to explore emotions and feelings, to cry and to laugh. It is a time to share memories, tell stories, and receive consolation.

When a Jewish person dies:

· Expect the service to take place the day after the death.

· The service will be held either at a funeral home or a synagogue/temple

· There will never be an open casket

· The service will be led by a rabbi

· The rabbi may deliver the eulogy or eulogies may be delivered by friends or family

· Close friends and family will attend the interment. All who attend the interment will participate in filling the grave.

· As the closest members of the family leave the gravesite, they pass between two rows of relatives and friends.

· Do telephone or visit the bereaved

· Do bring food, to be on the safe side, bring kosher food

· Do not send flowers

· Do make a contribution to a favorite charity in honor of the deceased

· When calling on family members who are sitting Shiva expect to stay for 20 to 30 minutes. The Mourners Kaddish will be recited twice a day, morning and evening. A guest should stand when the mourners stand and read along with the prayer in English

· The one-year anniversary of the death is marked with a ceremony, yahrzeit. This ceremony is by invitation only and usually involves a service at the synagogue and “unveiling” of the tombstone at the cemetery.

www.amosfamily.com

What is a Celebration of Life?

mail@amosfamily.com (Parker Amos) — Tue, 25 Jun 2024 20:42:13 GMT

Do you have to be rich or famous to have a celebration of life?

The celebration of life is the personal or individual aspect of a funeral service. It is about the person who died. It is about their relationships, their loves, their passions, their accomplishments, their beliefs, their talents. It is about what and who they cared about as they lived their own unique life. How did they make a difference?

A person does not have to be rich, or famous, or even publicly successful to have had a life that can be celebrated. Maybe they were simply a dependable friend, or a loving parent, a great teacher, or just fun to be around. Isn’t that enough reason to celebrate?

A celebration of life can be compared to a couple writing all or part of their own vows for a wedding ceremony. It is the part of the service that is about the person. It can be the cookies they baked, the children they raised, the oceans they sailed, the buildings they built. What made them who they are and different from the person who was in this funeral home last week? Why will they be missed?

Believe it or not, every person is unique. We all have a unique fingerprint, ear shape, and “thermal plume”. Our own little cloud formed of a combination of 44 compounds given off by our bodies as we strut our stuff around town. We are unique. That is what a celebration of life is all about, who we were and how we touched others as we lived our life. Anyone can have a Celebration of Life.

A Life Celebration is not an either-or proposition as in “should we have a religious funeral or a Life Celebration”. It is an and also proposition. You can have both. Especially when a person has a strong belief system that is just part of who they were. Talk to your funeral director. He or she can help you both honor faith and celebrate life.

www.amosfamily.com

How Can We Use Pictures at a Funeral?

Sun, 09 Jun 2024 04:00:00 GMT

Where are You Now? Three to Six Months After the Death of a Spouse

Sat, 25 May 2024 04:00:00 GMT

“When I Die, I Just Want You to …”

Sat, 11 May 2024 04:00:00 GMT

Adult children of parents of a certain age frequently find themselves caught off guard by parents who want to share their do’s and don’ts about their funeral service. It’s just natural to want to share thoughts on one’s final wishes. Most families appreciate the guidance. However, something this important really should be written and on file at the funeral home. Consistency is crucial. A series of “in the moment” comments to various children at different times, almost always leads to each child having at least a slightly different page at a time when they really need to work together. Those off hand missives are very frequently made without consideration of the mourners. Telling children, you don’t want to be viewed after death may mean that a dear granddaughter who lives far away misses out on the opportunity to say “good-bye” in a way that would have helped her. So, before telling your children what you would like for your funeral service consider asking them what they would like to do for you. It’s also for the family that is left behind. Enlisting the help of a funeral director or advance planner is very helpful and not at all difficult. Nearly all funeral homes have dedicated staff to help people plan funerals in advance. Parents and children can come together for the planning meeting and ensure everyone is on the same page. This service is typically provided by the funeral home at no charge and can provide peace of mind for the whole family. www.amosfamily.com

Make the most of the season by following these simple guidelines

duda@aftercare.com (Tukios Websites) — Mon, 29 Apr 2024 18:43:48 GMT

The new season is a great reason to make and keep resolutions. Whether it’s eating right or cleaning out the garage, here are some tips for making and keeping resolutions.

Make a list

Lists are great ways to stay on track. Write down some big things you want to accomplish and some smaller things, too.

Check the list regularly

Don’t forget to check in and see how you’re doing. Just because you don’t achieve the big goals right away doesn’t mean you’re not making progress.

Reward yourself

When you succeed in achieving a goal, be it a big one or a small one, make sure to pat yourself on the back.

Think positively

Positive thinking is a major factor in success. So instead of mulling over things that didn’t go quite right, remind yourself of things that did.

Keep in touch with site visitors and boost loyalty

duda@aftercare.com (Tukios Websites) — Mon, 29 Apr 2024 18:43:48 GMT

There are so many good reasons to communicate with site visitors. Tell them about sales and new products or update them with tips and information.

Here are some reasons to make blogging part of your regular routine.

Blogging is an easy way to engage with site visitors

Writing a blog post is easy once you get the hang of it. Posts don’t need to be long or complicated. Just write about what you know, and do your best to write well.

Show customers your personality

When you write a blog post, you can really let your personality shine through. This can be a great tool for showing your distinct personality.

Blogging is a terrific form of communication

Blogs are a great communication tool. They tend to be longer than social media posts, which gives you plenty of space for sharing insights, handy tips and more.

It’s a great way to support and boost SEO

Search engines like sites that regularly post fresh content, and a blog is a great way of doing this. With relevant metadata for every post so search engines can find your content.

Drive traffic to your site

Every time you add a new post, people who have subscribed to it will have a reason to come back to your site. If the post is a good read, they’ll share it with others, bringing even more traffic!

Blogging is free

Maintaining a blog on your site is absolutely free. You can hire bloggers if you like or assign regularly blogging tasks to everyone in your company.

A natural way to build your brand

A blog is a wonderful way to build your brand’s distinct voice. Write about issues that are related to your industry and your customers.

Tips for writing great posts that increase your site traffic

duda@aftercare.com (Tukios Websites) — Mon, 29 Apr 2024 18:43:47 GMT

Write about something you know. If you don’t know much about a specific topic that will interest your readers, invite an expert to write about it.

Speak to your audience

You know your audience better than anyone else, so keep them in mind as you write your blog posts. Write about things they care about. If you have a company Facebook page, look here to find topics to write about

Take a few moments to plan your post

Once you have a great idea for a post, write the first draft. Some people like to start with the title and then work on the paragraphs. Other people like to start with subtitles and go from there. Choose the method that works for you.

Don’t forget to add images

Be sure to include a few high-quality images in your blog. Images break up the text and make it more readable. They can also convey emotions or ideas that are hard to put into words.

Edit carefully before posting

Once you’re happy with the text, put it aside for a day or two, and then re-read it. You’ll probably find a few things you want to add, and a couple more that you want to remove. Have a friend or colleague look it over to make sure there are no mistakes. When your post is error-free, set it up in your blog and publish.

The Best Insurance Purchase You Will Ever Make

Sat, 27 Apr 2024 04:00:00 GMT

The storm passes and we are once again caught up in our love/hate relationship with insurance. Typically, we pay and pay and then we pray we don’t ever need to file a claim. No one wants to have their house burn down or blow away. But, it is also hard to write that check every month. Most folks do so because they are afraid not to. However, there is one kind of insurance you will absolutely use. You’ll get more than you paid in, and you don’t have to pay endlessly. Funeral insurance, not to be confused with final expense insurance, is the rare insurance product designed to cover a cost that you absolutely will incur. We all die in the end. So, how does it work? Funeral insurance is sold through your funeral home. The amount of the insurance matches the cost of your funeral in today’s dollars. It can be paid in one payment and you are done. Or, you can pay over three to 20 years and be covered for the whole cost of your funeral while you pay. It’s easy to find out more. Just call the funeral home and ask to speak to someone in the advance planning department. You will want to set aside one to two hours for your meeting with the advance planner. You will have questions. Remember to ask how funeral insurance is different from final expense insurance. www.amosfamily.com

After the Funeral: How Are You?

Sat, 13 Apr 2024 04:00:00 GMT

Funerals are Changing … but Grief is Still the Same.

Sat, 30 Mar 2024 04:00:00 GMT

Remembering a Rabid Football Fan

Sat, 16 Mar 2024 04:00:00 GMT

Vanished Without a Trace

Thu, 29 Feb 2024 05:00:00 GMT

No obituary was written, no stone was laid, no words were spoken, no one gathered, no songs were sung and yet… She went to church almost every Sunday of her life. She loved music. The opera and the song Amazing Grace were at the top of her list. She played golf and bet on the ponies. She traveled to China and saw the Great Wall, and to Rome, Paris, and Budapest. She won trophies at golf. She skied and was a master at bridge. She swam in the ocean, collected seashells and watched the whales. She read hundreds of books and saw scores of plays and movies. She painted walls, and flowers, and pictures of her pets. She raised five children and played with grandchildren and great grandchildren. She went to all the weddings, graduations, bridal showers and baby showers. She moved her family and her life 11 times to accommodate her husband’s career. She made new friends (that she kept forever) everywhere she moved. She started a new career of her own time and time again. And made more friends. She called friends, visited friends, wrote to friends and hung out with her friends. She was loved by her family and they visited often. Her home was full of pictures of family and friends. Her grandchildren learned about growing flowers and berries and tomatoes from her. She lived a long and productive life. So how, you might ask, did she come to pass from this earth without the event being marked or her life celebrated? How is that her friends do not even know she is gone? Why are her children and grandchildren bearing the loss without the comfort of each other’s company? She told them, “Please don’t make a fuss.” Her family took her at her word. No fuss was made. She vanished without a trace. www.amosfamily.com

Scam Protection

Thu, 15 Feb 2024 05:00:00 GMT

Age-Associated Financial Vulnerability

Fri, 02 Feb 2024 05:00:00 GMT

Making the Funeral About the One Who Died

Fri, 19 Jan 2024 05:00:00 GMT

Embalming … What Funeral Directors Do

Sat, 06 Jan 2024 05:00:00 GMT

Top three priorities for those who are grieving

Fri, 22 Dec 2023 05:00:00 GMT

When a person is in the midst of grief, taking care of themselves can get lost in the mayhem. There really are so many things to do. Eating well, exercise, and even sleep just don’t seem that important. The reality is that grief takes a lot of energy. Self-care might just be the most important item on the agenda. If you know someone who is grieving, feed them. Make it easy. Take them something to eat. The effort of ordering a meal or getting dressed to go out to eat can be overwhelming to a person who is mourning a loss. If you are grieving, buy a few easy-to-prepare foods. Eggs and soup can be a good start. Don’t overlook the freezer section. Buy an apple. Microwave popcorn is not a meal! Exercise doesn’t always need to involve weights, running, or even sweat. Just take a walk. Start small. Try ten minutes the first few days and then see if that can be increased each week. Set your sights on a 30 minute walk each day. The experts tell us we need seven to eight hours of sleep a night. They suggest going to bed at a regular time and getting up at a regular time. Set the alarm and watch those naps. It is tempting to use sleep to avoid those sad feelings. Too much sleep is no better than too little sleep. Try turning down the thermostat at night. Those in the know tell us 65 to 68 degrees is the optimal temp for sleep. Paying attention to these three basics, eating well, exercise, and sleep will help support a person who is involved in the difficult task of grieving. www.amosfamily.com

Trouble Sleeping After A Loss

Fri, 08 Dec 2023 05:00:00 GMT

Every day is full of moments. Moments charged with opportunity.

Fri, 24 Nov 2023 05:00:00 GMT

What can the funeral home do for a Veteran?

Fri, 10 Nov 2023 05:00:00 GMT

Many who serve in the United States Military make a career of service. Others serve for a brief period and then move on to other careers. Regardless of whether the military is a person’s life work or a part of their life for a brief period, the experience often leaves its mark. When the time comes to plan a funeral for a veteran it can be difficult for family members to sort out how much to emphasize the military service. Your funeral director is just the person to help. He or she can suggest ideas that incorporate all the important aspects of one’s life into a single cohesive service plan. The funeral home offers many products that have a military theme. Caskets, vaults, and cremation urns that represent each branch of the service are available to honor a veteran’s service experience. Pictures and video tributes can be put together that showcase all aspects and stages of life. Music selections may include the familiar songs that identify each branch of the service. All of the military aspects can be integrated with love of family, interests and hobbies, as well as spiritual beliefs that identify the multifaceted person who has died. The Federal Government provides burial benefits for those who are honorably discharged from any branch of the service. What is provided is dependent upon enlistment status at the time of death and circumstances of the death. Suffice it to say the burial benefit provided by the government will not take care of everything. The funeral director will help a veteran’s family access those benefits available and fill in where needed. www.amosfamily.com

Why don’t we celebrate life while the person is alive?

Fri, 27 Oct 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Interesting question, isn’t it? The person asking the question had recently attended what he described as a “fabulous funeral.” Turns out the funeral was billed as a celebration of life. Our questioner, Mark, attended because the person who died was the mother of a co-worker he had worked with for more than 30 years. Mark was so impressed with the woman’s talents, interests, and accomplishments, all of which were highlighted during the service, he said he wished he had known her. The service got him thinking. Perhaps the deceased would have enjoyed seeing how much her neighbors, friends, grandchildren and children thought of her? Mark was thinking it might be better to celebrate a person’s life BEFORE they die. What about that idea? Don’t we do that? Celebrate a person’s life while they are alive. It’s called a birthday party. Maybe we hold back a little. Perhaps we don’t gush over the person’s accomplishments as much on the birthday because the birthday boy or girl is too humble to feel comfortable being lauded while present and breathing? So, is the value of a wonderful life celebration/funeral diminished because the person it was all about isn’t there to enjoy it? Or does the “value” of a funeral run deeper than that? Isn’t a funeral a validation of the significance of life in general? Might the fact that Mark was so moved by this ordinary women’s life inspire him to make more of his own? Isn’t it a worthwhile lesson for all of us to take a few hours and remember a person who died? Each of us is unique. Each of us walks a different path. Shouldn’t just about everyone’s life be summed up with a “fabulous funeral”? www.amosfamily.com

Cheap Funerals

Fri, 13 Oct 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Cheap Cremation

Fri, 29 Sep 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Cremation or Burial… is That the Question?

Fri, 15 Sep 2023 04:00:00 GMT

What to Expect with Cremation?

Fri, 01 Sep 2023 04:00:00 GMT

What do you do with Cremated Remains?

Fri, 18 Aug 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Writing the thank you notes

Fri, 04 Aug 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Writing thank you notes is usually one of the very first “after the funeral” tasks you will undertake. You may be surprised to find that your brain/hand coordination is not working so well. You sit there with pen in hand and well-formed thoughts in your head, but somehow it all gets lost between the head and the paper. Don’t despair. This is normal and it’s all part of the grief journey. You are not thinking straight now, but you will again soon. First, let’s tackle who gets a “thank you” and then I can give you a few wordy ideas to help you get started. Anyone who made a donation or sent flowers should get a thank you note from a family member. You will also want to send a note to people who helped. Maybe they provided food or took care of the dog for you or picked up people at the airport. All of those folks should receive a note of thanks. You do not need to send notes to people who sent condolence cards, emails, or texts. Your words can be brief. No one expects a long letter from you at this time. It is just nice to know that the flowers arrived, or the donation was received. Your kind friends just need to hear thank you. Thank you for all your kindness …. Your help meant so much to us…. We all loved the broccoli, thank you for taking care of us …. Your flowers were so beautiful and such a comfort to us …. For some, these are written the day after the funeral. Everyone sits around the kitchen table to write the thank you notes and everyone laughs as more than a few notes are torn and tossed in the trash. This may be the first laughter heard in several days. www.amosfamily.com

Until Death Do Us Part: Losing a Spouse

Fri, 21 Jul 2023 04:00:00 GMT

The gift of a note to your family

Fri, 07 Jul 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Who Should Record my Funeral Wishes?

Fri, 23 Jun 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Dad died. What do I do with the pills?

Fri, 09 Jun 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Prescription medication is expensive. Just that fact can be an understandable motivation for some risky business. When my father died, my mother was asking everyone, “Aren’t you on blood pressure medicine? You take this heart pill don’t you? What do you take for depression?” Her plan, no waste. My mom will also save four string beans when dinner is over. The beans I can live with, the pills I think we are treading on thin ice. It’s just best to follow the FDA recommendations. In order to keep drugs from falling into the wrong hands (children, pets, and addicts) the FDA recommends that you dispose of all medication as soon as possible. They suggest three options. Take Back Programs : These are periodic events scheduled in your community for a specified date and time. In addition, some communities have permanent collection sites, you can find the location of permanent collection sites at the FDA website. Disposal in Household Trash: Many medications can be disposed of in the household trash following this process. Mix - the pills with dirt, cat litter, or coffee grounds. Do not crush the pills Seal – the mixture in a plastic bag Throw – the bag in the household trash Scratch – scratch the information on the prescription label off the bottle and discard Flushing down the toilet: FDA recommends that a short list of drugs be immediately flushed. These drugs are dangerously addictive for children and others who have not been prescribed the medication. A complete list of these drugs is posted on the FDA website. www.amosfamily.com

Mother died…how long do we keep her things?

Thu, 25 May 2023 04:00:00 GMT

What to look for when you are buying final expense insurance

Fri, 12 May 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Preplanning Your Funeral in your 60’s

Fri, 28 Apr 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Death and Taxes

Fri, 14 Apr 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Too Little Too Late - A Memorial Gone Wrong

Fri, 31 Mar 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Spring: A fresh optimistic start

Fri, 17 Mar 2023 04:00:00 GMT

Cooking for One …The Perfect Egg

Fri, 03 Mar 2023 05:00:00 GMT

Choosing Music for a Funeral

Fri, 17 Feb 2023 05:00:00 GMT

Who Becomes a Funeral Director?

Fri, 03 Feb 2023 05:00:00 GMT

What does the embalming room look like?

Fri, 20 Jan 2023 05:00:00 GMT

Three things to include in your funeral plan

Fri, 06 Jan 2023 05:00:00 GMT

Grief is Individual

Fri, 23 Dec 2022 05:00:00 GMT

How Should I Prepare for My Funeral Preplanning Meeting?

Fri, 09 Dec 2022 05:00:00 GMT

It's Not Really a Funeral Plan if it's Not at the Funeral Home

Fri, 25 Nov 2022 05:00:00 GMT

How to Thank a Veteran

Thu, 10 Nov 2022 05:00:00 GMT

Veterans Day - Thank You for Your Service

Fri, 28 Oct 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Because you are there we all sleep better at night. You serve in the Army, Air Force, Navy, Marines, and Coast Guard. Some of you serve for two years, some for twenty or more. Some enter into service at a tender age looking for opportunity. Some are following a longstanding family tradition. You are mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters. We, thank you for your service. You spend days, weeks, and even years away from your family. You are not always there to teach your daughter to ride her bike; perhaps you missed your son’s first steps. Because you serve, you can’t always be counted on to attend the baseball game or the teacher conference. With your service comes sacrifice. Sacrifices made by both you and your family. We thank you and your family for your service. Thank you for being ready and on alert so that we can go about our business without even thinking about the “what ifs”. Thank you for putting yourself in harms way. Thank you for giving us your time, your energy and your youth. Thank you for representing us with honor where ever you are stationed. Regardless of whether you serve us at home or in foreign lands, in time of war or peace, we thank you for your service. On Memorial Day we remember those who gave their lives in our service, on Armed Forces Day we honor those currently serving. On Veterans Day we honor all who have served our country from the Revolution in 1776 to today. Thank you. www.amosfamily.com

Talking with a Veteran

Fri, 14 Oct 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Should I Go to the Funeral?

Fri, 30 Sep 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Why should you attend a funeral? The presence of family and friends at the funeral is appreciated. We gather to acknowledge a life that was lived. We gather to comfort those for whom life has just been forever changed by the death of someone they loved. If you care for one or more of the survivors, you should attend the funeral (even if you did not know the person who died). Your friend will appreciate your presence. Being there shows that you acknowledge that your friend’s life has changed in some way. Your presence shows your support. If you knew the person who died but do not know their family, you should attend the funeral. Your presence demonstrates your respect for human life in general and the life of the person who died in particular. Perhaps you worked with the person who died. It is comforting for the surviving family to know the person they loved was also appreciated at work. If you are hesitating because you are unfamiliar with the person’s faith and fear you will embarrass yourself or feel like a fish out of water, go anyway. You will be fine. You can prepare a little in advance by looking for some information online about the funeral customs of the family’s faith. When should you stay home? Anytime you are going to a funeral and you know it will make one or more members of the immediate family uncomfortable, perhaps you shouldn’t go. If going is more about you and less about the deceased or the surviving family, don’t go. A funeral is not a place to prove a point. www.amosfamily.com

Thinking About Skipping the Funeral?

Fri, 16 Sep 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Honoring Military Service

Fri, 02 Sep 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Taps. There is nothing like the sound of those patriotic notes. It grabs your heart, it makes you cry. It honors the service and risk a man or woman took for our safety and the safety of our country. Public law provides military burial benefits for all who served and were honorably discharged from any of the five branches of the U.S. Military. Your funeral director or advance funeral planner can explain all of the benefits you or your family members are eligible to receive. They will also access those benefits related to the funeral or burial on your behalf. Your funeral director can help you weave the remembrance of your loved one’s military service into the fabric of their full life experience. Most who have served in any of the branches of our military, whether it be for a few years or as a career, will tell you the experience had a profound impact on their life. Even when the service period was brief and at a tender age and followed by many years of some other vocation, that service should be honored. The funeral professionals at your local funeral home have the resources and know how to help you get the remembrance just right. In addition to the playing of taps and flag ceremony provided by public law, there are caskets, vaults, and urns that highlight each branch of the armed services to be considered. Photos and music can also be a part of the funeral gathering or ceremony and can add so much to the remembrance. How much or how little your family wishes to focus on the military service of a loved one is a matter of personal choice. With the assistance of your funeral director, a military service can be planned that finds the perfect balance for your family. www.amosfamily.com

Moving After a Spouse Dies?

Fri, 19 Aug 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Finding YOUR Joy

Fri, 05 Aug 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Preserving the Family Relationship While Planning a Funeral

Fri, 22 Jul 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Do I Really Need to Attend the Funeral

Fri, 08 Jul 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Your presence is important. If there is any way possible, please, just be there. When a child is born it is a life changing event for the parents, siblings and grandparents at the very least. It may also be a life changing event for the kindergarten teacher five years in the future. Bottom line, life matters. When a life ends, it is also a life-changing event. Regardless of the age at which the person dies or circumstances of the death, lives will change. Family and friends will never see that person again. They will not share in each other’s joy. Neither will they have the opportunity to heal old wounds. They will not hear that voice in praise, love or anger ever again. It’s over, and in some way everyone close will have to adjust to the change. The funeral, the gathering together, acknowledges a living person is gone. Your presence says, “Yes, this life mattered. And, yes, your lives have changed. But not everything has changed, you still have us.” Going is important. The funeral home is a safe place for the family to receive guests and their condolences. It’s ok to cry at the funeral home. In a few weeks when you see this friend of yours who lost her mom, you will want to say something. And when you do, the emotion will open up and the sadness will surface. Crying at the grocery store or the soccer field is uncomfortable for everyone. When people organize a funeral gathering and ask friends and family to come to them to share in their loss and sorrow, to help them. Please go, hold a hand, give a hug, share a memory, offer your condolences, and smile at the video. Let them cry in a safe place. www.amosfamily.com

Where Should I Send my Condolences?

Fri, 24 Jun 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Why Plan Your Funeral in Advance?

Fri, 10 Jun 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Memorial Day

Fri, 27 May 2022 04:00:00 GMT

When the Soul Leaves the Body … Reacting to a Sudden Unexpected Death

Fri, 13 May 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Make Family the Foundation for Funeral Planning

Fri, 29 Apr 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Who Will Take Care of My Funeral Plans?

Fri, 15 Apr 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Get Your Family Involved in Funeral Planning

Fri, 01 Apr 2022 04:00:00 GMT

When death is near or has just occurred, there are so many things to do and yet there is nothing you can do. You feel helpless. You can’t make the person well or bring them back. But you know you will, very soon, need to make many decisions about the service, the final resting place, the music, food, flowers, donations, clothing and much more. Your mind is racing and oddly enough, at the same time, at a complete standstill. On one hand it feels like it is too soon to do anything. You’re just not ready. But at the same time, you feel the weight of all that is coming. This is stress. It is hard. If you can, reach out to your family and friends and let them help you. Have your son or daughter get the older grandchildren involved in pulling together pictures and music. They are really good at this stuff. Going through the pictures brings back happy memories and it’s one of the most therapeutic chores that comes with funeral preparation. Let them do something that will help them - they are dealing with this loss too. If would you would like family and friends to donate to a charity, put someone in charge of looking into that. Have your daughter-in-law pull together a few clothing choices for your final selection. Send your son-in-law to the cemetery or have him get the cars washed. You may want to delegate the task of writing the eulogy and obituary. Give someone the job of gathering information for the funeral luncheon or brunch. Spread the work around. Let go, embrace help and give them something to do. You’ll feel better that things are getting done and they’ll feel better because they are involved and helping. www.amosfamily.com

How Much do Funerals Cost?

Fri, 18 Mar 2022 04:00:00 GMT

Funerals are for Saints and Sinners

Fri, 04 Mar 2022 05:00:00 GMT

Control Funeral Costs by Planning Ahead

Fri, 18 Feb 2022 05:00:00 GMT

Food and Funerals

Fri, 04 Feb 2022 05:00:00 GMT